Kitten on speed & IKEA


It’s 10 pm and I’ve finally eaten a cooked meal. The more money I make the worse my diet gets. I got home to a kitten on speed who seems to think I am her new ass butler too. How is it that I had forgotten about long haired cats and shit that sticks to it? Oh God, I must be tired because I just combined dinner and my cat’s ass in the same paragraph!

The big news of the week is that I am still living at Mama’s! Believe me, this has not been by choice and I am only grateful that there was still some leftover food in the house tonight otherwise I may have lost my mind completely. The poor kitty has been locked up all day while I battled the intermittent rain while trying to unload yet another pile of crap into the new apartment in between English lessons and dodging parking tickets and buckets of rain.

It seems that the famous motto for IKEA, “Swedish for common sense” lost something in the Italian translation. This past weekend I bought a new bed. I had it all figured out and even printed stuff from their website, how could I possibly go wrong? I forgot I was in Italy, that was my first mistake. My second mistake was that I didn’t look at the tag carefully enough.

But here comes the common sense part…girl buys double bed, double mattress, double frame and single base for frame. You would think that after dealing with four IKEA staff someone would have noticed the error! Why would someone buy a single sized base? It seems that I should have bought 2 single bases which = a double. Go figure! But nobody, including myself happened to notice until of course Elora and I were sweating and swearing putting the darn thing together to save me an additional 100 Euros…where are the husband’s when you need them??? Ahem, no comment.

I successfully drove to IKEA today on my own and bought the second base, I think that the “common sense part” is that they make you screw something up to lure you back into the store again because this time I saw cute hand puppets for only 3.99 Euros and of course I have 4-year-old students so I bought a few…call it insurance because right now I haven’t got the time to research some stupid game for them to play while they run in circles ignoring me screaming the alphabet in their tiny little ears.

Would it be unethical to give the kitty some valuim? I need some sleep!

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About lmarmstrong66

I'm a blogger, painter, writer, singer. For the love of all things in nature and creativity.
This entry was posted in Italian Culture, Mama, Teaching English, Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Kitten on speed & IKEA

  1. Sarah Fontó says:

    Do you have any tinned fish in the house ? That has always done the trick in the kitty valium deptment for me ( = Let furbaby stuff self silly and sleep will follow.

    Big congrats for new home and new baby !!!

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