Meet the new ass butler

Okay, first of all I will admit that the title of this post was borrowed from a very funny lady in Toronto who has 2 kids and one is still in diaper’s, hence the “ass butler” comment. She blogs and I have become a fan of her daily humorous posts about motherhood and life. I urge you to check her out at

The amazing Gus!

Now, back to the title of this post…I’m a cat person, just in case you haven’t noticed, but I love dogs too. Just ask my brother, he has the best dog in the world and Gus will always be welcomed to cuddle his 100 pound dogness on my lap, besides, it’s cold in Canada and he can keep you pretty warm! Just don’t feed him cheese before you cuddle up for a movie night or he will fart you into the house next door.

A few days ago my sister-in-law dropped off her dog. This is pretty routine because when she’s at work the neighbours complain about the dog barking all day. So instead he gets to come here and bark all day! Vale (short for Valentino), was a rescue dog. He is scared of his own tail but will growl and bark at the wind.

The bomb was dropped the other day that Vale will be barking his little head off with us all week because “mom” is busy helping a sick friend in Milan. Fair enough, Stelle got lots of love and attention while I was away but let’s be honest here, this is hardly an even trade.

For some strange reason Vale has decided he likes me and has officially nominated me his new ass butler. I don’t mind taking a dog for a walk as long as it’s not minus 30 and 2:00 a.m., but I gotta tell you, this dog is NOT trained and zigzags his way down the streets with me tripping over his leash and other dog shit every third step.


Am I a bit overdressed to scoop poop?

When he finally starts to purse his ass tight and quiver his bony legs close to the pavement I know he is about to give me a big smelly reward that I am duly expected to place  into a plastic bag and dispose of. For such a skinny dog he sure knows how to digest a meal. So meet the new ass butler, yeah, that would be me…now do I really need to explain to you why I’m a cat person?


About lmarmstrong66

I'm a blogger, painter, writer, singer. For the love of all things in nature and creativity.
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4 Responses to Meet the new ass butler

  1. major2007 says:

    Too funny, no wonder you prefer cats. I am glad Major only poops once a day and eh has his spot down behind my shed.

  2. major2007 says:

    It sounds like this dog is really trying to make you a dog person after all, good luck with being his personal ass butler.

  3. Lori Dyan says:

    Oh Emm Gee. We are making ass butler part of the general vernacular…I LOVE IT!!!!

    So happy that I’ve found your blog – you are living many people’s dream (except maybe for the MIL part…!).

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